I used to be a sailor

As a child, I spent seven years sailing the seven seas. My father is a boatbuilder and it was his dream to take my Mother and I on a journey to places we could only dream of.

Adventures we had. Our first journey from Kinsale, Ireland to Gibraltar led to us being fired at by Portuguese pirates aboard an unmarked fishing trawler. I stayed below deck watching anxiously from the porthole while my Dad ducked under bullets and fired flares back at them. Our 42 foot steel bilge keeled boat had a fast turning circle, and we span on the spot deflecting their attacks. Eventually their engines burned out and we skulked away turning off our lights. At seven years old I became suddenly aware of my own mortality and what it meant to be a tiny vessel in a vast ocean. I used to be a sailor:

As a child, I spent seven years sailing the seven seas. My father is a boatbuilder and it was his dream to take my Mother and I on a journey to places we could only dream of.

Adventures we had. Our first journey from Kinsale, Ireland to Gibraltar led to us being fired at by Portuguese pirates aboard an unmarked fishing trawler. I stayed below deck watching anxiously from the porthole while my Dad ducked under bullets and fired flares back at them. Our 42 foot steel bilge keeled boat had a fast turning circle, and we span on the spot deflecting their attacks. Eventually their engines burned out and we skulked away turning off our lights. At seven years old I became suddenly aware of my own mortality and what it meant to be a tiny vessel in a vast ocean.I used to be a sailor:

As a child, I spent seven years sailing the seven seas. My father is a boatbuilder and it was his dream to take my Mother and I on a journey to places we could only dream of.

Adventures we had. Our first journey from Kinsale, Ireland to Gibraltar led to us being fired at by Portuguese pirates aboard an unmarked fishing trawler. I stayed below deck watching anxiously from the porthole while my Dad ducked under bullets and fired flares back at them. Our 42 foot steel bilge keeled boat had a fast turning circle, and we span on the spot deflecting their attacks. Eventually their engines burned out and we skulked away turning off our lights. At seven years old I became suddenly aware of my own mortality and what it meant to be a tiny vessel in a vast ocean.

Our adventures continued; disasters struck; hurricanes were reckoned with. We never had any money, and we lived hand to mouth, men took advantage of me, people took advantage of us, i missed making permanent friends. At that time, when we were traveling, mobiles did not exist, there was no internet. We were isolated and alone. But there were good times too. I have seen places only reachable by boat, I have seen skies that never end, I have swam with whales and sharks, visited people who have never met another outsider. I learned languages and broadened my horizons.

The sea, our boat- they changed my life. My parents got divorced in Trinidad and Tobago when I was 11, because the boat became to small for them. I stayed aboard with my father for another few years until I decided it was time for me to get a conventional education and to escape the madness of being part of the transient boat community. I moved to England, where I now live. I felt more of an outsider than ever here. Other teenagers knew about the latest pop acts and what was on television, I wore trousers with African fabrics and knew about fishing and tying knots.

My childhood was a rich tapestry of adventure. These days nothing so exciting happens to me. I go to work, I come home, I sleep, I eat. Now I'm just an island, stationary.

Interestingly, we took very very few pictures of our trip. People take pictures when things are extraordinary or special. Our adventures became commonplace to us. These days, I record everything I do, as though I need a picture to prove it happened, and to make up for a childhood without much evidence of me having been anywhere. I take Polaroids, because they are instant, and as the picture appears you can hold it in your hand- it becomes a souvenir of the place where it was shot.

Lately I have been attempting to revisit the places I went to as a child, this time armed with my camera. I am shooting these places retrospectively, to recreate my memories.

The sea has infected me with wanderlust. It changed me. It is the most frightening thing on earth- so big, dark, anonymous. But because of that it is comforting too. If you can face the sea, you can face anything- nature, loneliness, boredom, fear, wonderment. Somewhere under the surface of my skin salty water still flows.

One day I may return, the sea has that power to draw you in. Once it is in you, you can never really let go.